bala krishna effect

1. Balayya makes onions cry
2. Balayya can delete the Recycle Bin.
3. Ghosts are actually caused by balayya killing people faster than Death can process them.
4. Balayya can build a snowman..... out of rain.
5. Balayya can strangle you with a cordless phone.
6. Balayya can drown a fish.
7. When Balayya enters a room, he doesn't turn the lights on,......... .... he turns the dark off.
8. When Balayya looks in a mirror the mirror shatters, because not even glass is stupid enough to get in between Balayya and Balayya.
9. Brett Favre can throw a football over 50 yards. Balayya can throw Brett Favre even further.
10. The last digit of pi is Balayya. He is the end of all things.
11. Balayya does not know where you live, but he knows where you will die.
12. Bullets dodge Balayya.
13. A Handicap parking sign does not signify that this spot is for handicapped people. It is actually in fact a warning, that the spot belongs to Balayya and that you will be handicapped if you park there.
14.Balayya' calendar goes straight from March 31st to April 2nd, no one fools Balayya
15. If you spell Balayya wrong on Google it doesn't say, "Did you mean Balayya? " It simply replies, "Run while you still have the chance."
16. Balayya can do a wheelie on a unicycle.
17. Once a cobra bit Balayya' leg. After five days of excruciating pain, the cobra died.
18. When Balayya gives you the finger, he's telling you how many seconds you have left to live.
19. Balayya can kill two stones with one bird.
20. Balayya was once on Celebrity Wheel of Fortune and was the first to spin. The next 29 minutes of the show consisted of everyone standing around awkwardly, waiting for the wheel to stop.
21. Leading hand sanitizers claim they can kill 99.9 percent of germs. Balayya can kill 100 percent of whatever he wants.
22. There is no such thing as global warming. Balayya was cold, so he turned the sun up.
23. Balayya can set ants on fire with a magnifying glass. At night.
24. Balayya has a deep and abiding respect for human life? unless it gets in his way.
25. It takes Balayya 20 minutes to watch 60 Minutes.
26. Balayya once shot down a German fighter plane with his finger, by yelling, "Bang!"
27. In an average living room there are 1,242 objects Balayya could use to kill you, including the room itself.
27. Behind every successful man, there is a woman. Behind every dead man, there is Balayya.
28. Balayya destroyed the periodic table, because Balayya only recognizes the element of surprise.
29. Balayya got his drivers license at the age of 16 Seconds.
30. With the rising cost of gasoline,Balayya is beginning to worry about his drinking habit.
31. The square root of Balayya is pain. Do not try to square Balayya, the result is death.
32. When you say "no one's perfect", Balayya takes this as a personal insult."